October 29 was the toughest moment we had to go through and experienced as an entire family especially Nanay. It was not just us but everyone who dearly admired and loved you.
You know why? Of course I know you do or else you won’t be where you are now.
It was early morning of that day we asked you or I meant shouted at you so you could hear us loud and clear “TATAY! FIGHT! FIGHT! LABAN KA TAY!” to fight for your life until you wake up and be back to normal. I guess you got tired of fighting from the night before and just gave yourself up in the hands of our Lord.
You know what Tay, this was the time that God did not answer our very important prayer. We prayed alone so hard. We prayed together so hard. We kneeled and beg him so hard to bring you back to life, to wake us up from this bad dream. But as you always say to us “MAY PLANO ANG DIYOS SA LAHAT NG NANGYAYARI SA ATIN - KUNG SASAGUTIN NIYA ANG PANALANGIN NATIN O HINDI. LAHAT YUN AY PARA SA ATING IKAKABUTI.”
It hurts so much Tay to see you lifeless at the hospital bed but after the doctors and nurses removed the tubes in you, we all saw what is behind those — a SMILE ON YOUR FACE. Despite the pain you’ve gone through the night before, you were smiling. It is for us to conclude that you are happy where you are now. Happy in the presence of our Father. Then we again remind ourselves how God’s plan will always prevail and how it is always good.
Tatay, allow me to thank you from the bottom of my heart for being the best grandfather in the whole world (no one could ever replace you in my heart and in my life), for loving us, for being concern with our studies, jobs or anything that we do, for appreciating our efforts or any of our achievements, for being proud of us always, for your guidance and most of all for being an exemplary model of putting Christ first in our lives. You are a great man of God - you were always there with open arms and open heart to help those in need. You were never greedy and you knew what it meant to extend a hand. You gave away things and properties that were valuable to you just because God impressed it on your heart. I have attest of you putting all your words into action thus you’ve left a legacy behind — look at all the people who are mourning at your lost. They could not wait to see you at that box so they started seeing you while we had the 12 hour waiting period before embalmment.
Tatay, we will miss you a lot. I will deeply miss your presence, your persistent calls to buy immediately what you wanted us to buy for you, your lectures and your knowledge on the new Apple gadgets available in the market that you would like to buy immediately.
I would also like to apologize if I’ve done anything that hurt you. Also Tay, sorry that I haven’t married yet, as you always say “Ano? Di ka pa ikakasal? Matanda ka na at tumatanda na rin ako.” I know you would like to meet the man I would be married with and I feel so sad knowing you won’t be there when I walk down the aisle but I know you’ll be watching from above. You know what Tay, the reason I’m not yet married is because no one is asking (ha ha ha) but the main reason of it all is I would like to be married to a man who has a character like you. You have set the standards and I think it is just difficult to be like you because I myself is still not half way of what you are. I’m praying to be just like you.
Tay, I know you would not like us to cry and be sad at your loss. If you are just here, I know you’ll tell of us “Tama na yan! Masaya ako dito oh! Babantayan ko kayo lagi. Ang importante, magmahalan kayo lagi at wag kakalimutan ang Diyos. Magpasalamat lagi sa kanya dahil yung ang pinaka-importante sa lahat.” For now Tay, allow us to grieve at your passing. It was so sudden, we’re left broken or paralyzed if that could be a better term of what we are feeling right now.
My thought when I was at your place — seeing your cars, the dining table, the massage chair, your room and everything in it — “How do we all stand, when the pillar is gone?” Tay, I know it will be so difficult for all of us to stand and move on our own but please guide us in anyway. You will be our GUARDIAN ANGEL.
Right now, God is helping us understand and accept peacefully why He got you. We all believed that you have accomplished all tasks He asked you to do. So you simply, gave up your working tools and joined Him in Heaven so you could both watch all of us from above.
Tatay, I love you so much. I will do all my best in work, school and life so you could be proud of me more in heaven. I will continue doing what you’ve taught us to do. I will love everyone in the family and the ones you love as well. We will take care of Nanay and put her best interest first than ours.
I know you are already in Heaven watching over us. I am sure you are also looking down with love and pride at the family you built. You can be rest assured that we will never forget what you have taught us and that we will pass it down to the next generation.
I know I can speak for everyone, we will miss you and we will never forget you because you’ve been the best and you have imprinted yourself permanently in our hearts. We love you.
I will see you soon.
- The Thoughtful Son
*** This Article is dedicated to the "GREAT" ARMANDO Q. LEYVA. Tatay, I always miss you and I love you so much... Happy 79th Birthday Tay... :_(