August 27,
2015. I was watching a film at around lunchtime and then I fell asleep at the
middle of it. I woke up a few hours later having an unusual bizarre feeling, a
sensation so cold as if it was the month of January in Baguio, where the
temperature is at its most coolest point. Both of my hands and feet were never
this cold during the month of August. I looked at my phone and saw several
missed calls, all coming from each of my family members. Then I received
another immediate call from my mother who is crying, whispering and undertoned.
She told me “AL, wala na si Raine…”, I screamed to my disbelief as I was caught
offguard. With an afflicted weak distressed emotion, my sanity has failed me.
My perception and conception of what is around me were all distorted…
I
quickly rushed to the hospital where Raine’s body was lying but I got there too
late. I was dreadfully agonized & worried for Raine and my brother.
Contemplating my brother’s pain and I can’t even begin to picture what he is
going through in those very moments. He was doing his usual routine in the
hospital, when at lunchtime, Raine’s mother, Tita Wilma called my brother,
hysterically shouting “Lyko, patay na si Raine!”. My brother immediately took a
taxi cab and raced himself going to Raine’s house, with traffic jam slowing
down the taxi, my brother asked the driver to do the hazard beeping. And when
he finally saw Raine, he carried her right away and rapidly brought her to the
nearest possible hospital. While in the taxi, he continued reviving her from
the start to the very finish. Even if he knew within himself that he couldn’t
do anything anymore because Raine has been already gone for several hours. I
felt my brother’s despair, it was his dream to be a Doctor so that he could
give Raine their dream life together and yet he can’t even do the basic thing
that a Doctor does, to save her… Not even with all his acquired talents &
skills for over a decade of medical training could’ve saved her. That’s the
most painful thing of being a Doctor, when you can’t save any of your family
members despite on all of these knowledge on how to save a life.
I
tried calling my brother to ask where he is because I was extremely worried for
him & Raine but he’s not answering any of my calls. And then he texted me
“Kuya, wala na si Raine.”. That message coming from my little brother just
crushed my being, I can’t even imagine how my brother is feeling at that very
exact moment. He was all alone with Raine’s lifeless body inside the Chapel
where Raine would stay for the next 4 days. It even came to my thought, that if
I only had the power to bring Raine back to life, I would do it without
thinking twice because I can’t stand seeing my brother suffering and in deep
agony.
As
I have arrived at the Chapel. There I saw my little brother outside of the
Chapel doors, waiting for Raine to be dressed for her funeral. He then saw me
and when I got near him, he instantly brokedown and can’t help contain his
tears anymore, he just cried to me. I never said any single word, I just hugged
him right away and cried with him…
Raine
was just 26. I was not only saddened but also felt so much regret over her life
because she was full of limitless potentials. She was a rare one, she was a
jewel found in the deepest bedrocks. She was one of the greatest people I knew,
she’s third on my list, just next to my grandfather and mother. All of our
family members, with no exemptions loved her and treated her already as one of
our own, that’s why she left them broken & in tears and believe me when I
say that it is a rare story, when a person is wholly accepted by each & all
family members without any single doubt or protest. Her friends &
colleagues loved her so much that she also left them in tears even while having
their scheduled duties in the hospital and believe me again when I say that for
those 4 days that she was in the Chapel, there was a nonstop outpouring
arrivals of visitors every single day, most especially in the evening where
people had already reached the outside of the Chapel building. And everywhere
you go, everywhere you look and anyone you ask, there’s only one best word that
would describe Raine as to why all people loved her. "She is simply “SELFLESS”.
She always made an effort to give time for everyone else’s needs, even if it
means having no time for herself anymore, she always made sure that everyone
else comes first before her own needs." I can’t believe that a 26 year old,
still has many dreams left unaccomplished, would have a strong impact such as
this on so many people. It is very much uncommon for a 26 year old to leave a
beautiful legacy such as this. If I personally know nothing about her, I would
think of her funeral as that of a celebrity or politician’s funeral. That is
how Raine has imprinted herself permanently onto people’s hearts. She has left
them scarred forever…
2
days before she will be brought into her final resting place, my brother had
shared to me a secret, to which I am the first one to know at that moment. He
bought a gift for Raine that she so longly deserved. The night before he told
me his secret, he went to this shop to search for that particular gift and he
even asked Raine for her guidance on what she would choose. And he first showed
it to me the very next day. While he is showing it to me, we can’t help contain
our feelings again and we both cried together. He told me “Kuya, ito yung hindi
ko nagawa para kay Raine…” and that is to give her, her dream engagement ring… His
plan was to wear it into Raine’s finger on the day that he will see her face
for the very last time… Again, I had reflected this thought in my mind, that if
Raine were still alive, that very exact same ring that he will wear into
Raine’s finger could’ve been the day that he will see her face for the very
first time as the person that he will grow old with for the rest of his life and instead, we will be happy & celebrating it together with his proposal
plans. But that is how GOD’s plan works, it is beyond our limited minds because
GOD’s knowledge on all of these things is beyond infinite, beyond whatever we
could’ve imagine.
I
would also recall the very heartbreaking speech of my little brother for Raine,
comparing their 10 year relationship and lovestory to that of a “Bonsai”, a tree cut so
short to prevent it from growing further but still remains to be very beautiful
to look at. That it had a sense, a meaning and an impact despite of it being
small.
- The Thoughtful Son
*** This Article is dedicated to MARY “RAINE” LORAINE ZULUETA GARCIA. I always miss you Raine...
